We all have points in our lives where the stress gets unbearable. For some it's easier to cope with than others. I know I've dealt with it myself. You have to understand that parents always give their children a hard time. They want you to do well and you clearly are with a GPA that high in college. Be proud of yourself, there aren't many people that can do so well like you in college. They give you a hard time, because it's their way of keeping you on track and in focus. They want you to keep working hard so that the GPA stays as high as it is, they'd hate to see all that effort go to waste. Even if you're not the type of person to slack off, your parents are looking out for you. They love you and care about you because they have to care to do all those things to you. Sometimes it can go too far, and they might not realise this. In that case, just give them a break because they know that you work hard, and they just want you to keep it up for the future. I've felt like I'm not doing well enough myself. Even after my exams finished a few weeks ago, my parents seemed so worried about me, because they didn't see me study that hard. The thing is with them, that if they don't see me study, they don't think I've done anything, and this worries them, because they want my grades to flourish so that I'll be able to attend the university I want to later this year. They do give me a hard time sometimes, but I put up with it because I know they love me and they're only trying to help. We do fight sometimes, and it annoys them and it annoys me. But you have to think that these small fights don't mean much, and every family has them. It's just a part of life, it's what makes a family who they are. Just yesterday my mum was nagging me to clean my room and she stropped off, but later on we'd forgotten about it and moved on. Try not to get so worked up about it and try to remain calm. Use a stress ball if you want or listen to some music to calm you down and soothe your nerves. I've also found that taking a shower helps to clear my mind.
I've often thought that my parents favour one of my sisters. I'm the middle child and a boy with two sisters no less, and it really gets to me sometimes. But no matter what you think and what things appear to be, your parents love each of you the same. They care about all of you, so never think of yourself as the odd one out, because you're not. They might talk her up more because she might be less secure about herself, and they want to reassure her that they love her. Each child is not the same, and some are more fragile than others. They're looking out for each of you exactly how they think you need it. They might think that you're capable of being more independent and they see you as that, and you should embrace that.
With the boyfriend thing, parents can often look too far ahead and think about marriage early. It does seem that they are thinking about it too much, and there's not a lot you can do about that. Just be nice with their comments and gently rub it off, they care about you, but are slightly overanalysing it. Be happy that they care about you that much, but at the same time don't go too hard on them about the comments, as you might just cause other problems. Respect their opinions however much you might find it annoying.
I'd advise you to talk to a guidance counsellor at your college. I'm sure they have one for careers and you can definitely sit down with them and talk it out. They'll help you find what you want to do. Do you mind staying in college for those extra years and have the college fees to pay, while keeping in mind how much more likely a graduate degree is likely to get you a job, one with a higher starting salary perhaps? Take a shower and sit down on your bed with a pad of paper and a pen and write down the pros and cons of staying on for grad school and what you'd like to do as a person.
Talk to your boyfriend about it, he sounds really caring, and I'm sure he'd be willing to give his input and advice, but at the end of the day it's your life and your future, he can't decide it for you. I've found that the stress can go away by taking my mind off things. Sometimes people work their brains too hard and you have to let it relax and recharge. Go away for a weekend somewhere with your boyfriend, or your friends to a spa or something. You can even do things locally like go to the cinema or go for a nice meal. Even watching TV or going for a walk can help. Take a breath of fresh air now and then and enjoy what life has to offer!
I hope this has helped, feel free to PM me anytime if you want to talk.
- Balazs
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