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  LiveWire / College Forums / College Sexuality / Viewing Topic

20-year old male virgin
Replies: 23Last Post Jan. 4 4:08pm by allieb
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( Anonymous )

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I went to an all-boys high school, and never went out much until senior year. I got myself a girlfriend, and got to 2nd base for the first time in my life with her. I broke up with her before we got any further b/c I knew I didn't want a long-distance relationship (I was going away to college), and I didn't want to have sex with her or something only to break it off soon after.

I'm in my third year of college now, and I still haven't gotten past 2nd base. I was so naive during freshman year, and I guess I didn't "take advantage" of the hookup scene. I was too concerned about coming off like a douchebag.

And now, I'm really concerned that I'll turn 21 (in early 2009) without having made any sexual progress since high school. I've asked out a couple of girls I liked, because I'm more comfortable in a dating rather than a hooking up scenario, but they both turned me down. I've got a lot of other girls I'm interested in, and I hope to be dating them soon, but what if they all turn me down too?

I think I have to start being more sexually aggressive and unapologetic.


9:46 am on Oct. 25, 2008
Rabgix


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Yeah, or become a dick. Girls hate nice guys, as much as they deny it, its the truth.

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9:48 am on Oct. 25, 2008 | Joined July 2008 | 125 Days Active
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Micus


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Hahaha you are unlike the vast majority of guys I know.

Go out and get some tang, my friend.

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rockerpunk


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nothing wrong with being a virgin...some girls like that....rather then a man whore

9:49 am on Oct. 25, 2008 | Joined Oct. 2007 | 169 Days Active
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qi


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Go to a party with some girls you like and drink a lot and you'll end up not a virgin.

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9:49 am on Oct. 25, 2008 | Joined April 2008 | 139 Days Active
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randomrocks


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pm me if you want advice and to talk about it

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qi


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Quote: from rockerpunk at 9:49 am on Oct. 25, 2008

nothing wrong with being a virgin...some girls like that....rather then a man whore

Any girls will say they prefer a man with experience, you don't have to be an STD ridden man-whore to have sexual experience.  top making things up.

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9:50 am on Oct. 25, 2008 | Joined April 2008 | 139 Days Active
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fedoragirl


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There is seriously nothing wrong with being a virgin, even in college.  It's not worth it to loose it to someone you aren't crazy about.

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Just Waiting Here


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Personally, I don't see anything wrong with that.  My boyfriend was a 21 year old virgin because he also didn't want to have sex with some female that he wasn't going to have a committed relationship with.  It all depends on what you want.

I mean, you look back now and think that you should have 'taken advantage' of it.  But if you DID do that back then, you probably would have regretted it... so it wasn't really the wrong choice.

If you're ready to be more sexually active now, and you really, at this point, don't care about who you are with.  There are plenty of females that are just interested in hooking up.  So you could make yourself more comfortable with that.

Otherwise, if you're looking for a more committed relationship, or just a relationship in general, it's going to take a bit more time.  It all depends on what you want.  If you're just trying to get with a girl into a relationship for sex, then make it clear to the female that you're not interested in something committed.  But if you truly want to be close with that female, it's bound to take more time.

I just don't think these things should have a time limit... to each their own, but I just find it strange to say that it's concerning that you're turning such and such age and you still haven't done something.


9:51 am on Oct. 25, 2008 | Joined Dec. 2007 | 320 Days Active
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bg kNIFE


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Oh.. that is major fail. Get a hooker.

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9:53 am on Oct. 25, 2008 | Joined Feb. 2005 | 704 Days Active
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Just Waiting Here


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Quote: from qi at 9:50 am on Oct. 25, 2008

Quote: from rockerpunk at 9:49 am on Oct. 25, 2008

nothing wrong with being a virgin...some girls like that....rather then a man whore

Any girls will say they prefer a man with experience, you don't have to be an STD ridden man-whore to have sexual experience. top making things up.

How can you say they are making something up when they said 'some girls', and you AREN'T making things up when you say 'any girl'.

Personally, I was quite happy having my boyfriend being a virgin at the time.  And if for some reason we break up, I would much rather prefer the next person be a virgin than someone that's recently been sleeping with several girls just because.


9:54 am on Oct. 25, 2008 | Joined Dec. 2007 | 320 Days Active
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sadnessness


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i disagree with what some people on here have said, id rather have a guy without loads of sexual experience because a) it means you will have more respect for me when we do sleep together and b) it means you arent as susceptable to peer pressure as those who (stupidly IMO) lose it at 13

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momo4ever


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Don't worry about it...
Maybe this isn't the advice you are looking for?
But just be outgoing... stay nice! Don't become a jerk!
Hopefull you will find a girl that will want to, ya know?

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qi


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Quote: from Just Waiting Here at 9:54 am on Oct. 25, 2008

Quote: from qi at 9:50 am on Oct. 25, 2008

Quote: from rockerpunk at 9:49 am on Oct. 25, 2008

nothing wrong with being a virgin...some girls like that....rather then a man whore
 
 Any girls will say they prefer a man with experience, you don't have to be an STD ridden man-whore to have sexual experience.  top making things up.

How can you say they are making something up when they said 'some girls', and you AREN'T making things up when you say 'any girl'.

Personally, I was quite happy having my boyfriend being a virgin at the time. And if for some reason we break up, I would much rather prefer the next person be a virgin than someone that's recently been sleeping with several girls just because.



Look at the topics about it in teen sex, nearly 90% of the girls say they'd rather have a guy with experience and all the rest are virgins themselves.  Plus, my point was also how she said that guys with sexual experience are man-whores.

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9:56 am on Oct. 25, 2008 | Joined April 2008 | 139 Days Active
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Just Waiting Here


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Quote: from qi at 9:56 am on Oct. 25, 2008

Look at the topics about it in teen sex, nearly 90% of the girls say they'd rather have a guy with experience and all the rest are virgins themselves. Plus, my point was also how she said that guys with sexual experience are man-whores.

Yes, but you said any girl, which implies all.  The person you quoted said 'some girls'.  And they never said someone with sexual experience was a man whore.  They merely stated that some girls would rather a virgin over a manwhore, without any definition on what a manwhore is.

My point is, that ~your~ statement must be false, since I am not included in this 'any girl' statement.  I really could care less about the physical pleasure of sex, and I find the emotional aspect of it much more important.


10:00 am on Oct. 25, 2008 | Joined Dec. 2007 | 320 Days Active
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